Thanks For The Memories
by webofdreams89
Summary: Penelo decides to leave Vaan after he can't be the man she needs him to be. VaanPenelo.
1. Chapter 1

* * *

**A/N: This is a short story with four chapters planned, plus an epilogue. Penelo decides to leave Vaan after he can't be the man she needs. Vaan can't live without her, so how exactly will he prove himself to her? Enjoy!**

* * *

**Thanks For The Memories**

* * *

**Chapter 1**

* * *

"Would you like to order, ma'am?" the waiter asked me for the third time. He was tall and impossibly thin with hair as white as snow and ice blue eyes. The first time I saw him, I had the notion that he had been conceived in the middle of a blizzard.

I looked down at the small gold watch Vaan bought for me the day he bought his first airship, _The Dancer._ It was 9:26, approximately two and half hours after the time Vaan had given me to meet him at our favorite restaurant, Dalma's. He told me that he might be a little late as he had a lot of business to take care of today, but he'd be there. Today was our two-year anniversary.

"Has Vaan sent word as to what's going on?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

The waiter, Joso, shook his head. "I'm sorry, Miss Penelo, Mr. Vaan has not."

"Thank you, Joso," I said, trying not to snap at him. It wasn't his fault my husband had the inability to tell time. I took a big swallow of my wine, draining it and slamming it down. I grabbed my purse and walked to the cashier. "Charge everything to my husband's account," I hissed, storming out to the restaurant.

I was dressed in a knee length little black dress and black velvet pumps. Not exactly the best attire to be walking the four miles to our apartment in. I had hailed a carriage earlier, but right now, I was just too angry to deal with one, instead, just slipping off my shoes and walking.

Roughly three minutes into my trek home, I realized that I really, really didn't want to go home. I knew what was going to happen because it did everytime. I'd walk home and put on my longest, ugliest nightgown, the one that screamed not sex for you tonight. I'd grab whatever book I was reading at the time and sit on the couch, never making it past the first couple of sentences. I'd slam the book shut and stare at the door until he came home, usually around two in the morning. He'd make all kinds of excuses and I'd try hard to stay mad at him, but I rarely could. I knew he'd always be married to the sky before he was married to me. Either way, we'd always end up making love, with him promising never to put business first again. And I'd lap it up everytime.

It was so routine, almost set in stone because it quite literally happened _everytime._ But it wouldn't tonight.

I remembered the note I'd found earlier shoved under the front door early this morning. It had been from Balthier and Fran, stating that they were in town and Vaan and I should pay them a visit.

The airfield was much closer than the apartment, about only a half-mile away. I changed course, turning down a well-lit street. You can never be too careful walking the streets at night, especially if you're a young woman. Which is precisely why I kept a dagger in my purse, along with a can of pepper spray, and a dagger strapped to my leg with a garter and one tucked between my breasts in a loop. Actually, it was Vaan's brother, Reks, that had given me the idea. He once said that it was unfair that men had so much more strength in their bodies than women. I told him that was why women had to be prepared, and he said that women had an excellent location to hid small weapons, a place men didn't have, but sure liked to look at. I've been sewing these makeshift sheaths into my bras ever since.

Usually I liked to carry more weapons on my person than just daggers, but belts for swords and guns tended to look a little tacky when wearing such a nice dress. Normally I would have worn them anyway, but it was my anniversary and I thought my husband, who usually carries enough weapons for three allies, was going to be there. And being the wife of an up-and-coming skypirate was almost asking to get attacked. I wanted everyone to know that I could and would strike back if the attacked me.

Five minutes later, after a bit of brisk walking, I arrived at the airfield, stopping in awe as I always did. When trying to describe it, the first word that always came to mind was huge. It went on nearly as far as I could see, growing larger every year as Dalmasca prospered under our new queen. Airships were everywhere, littering the entire airfield with overpaid mechanics and parts salesmen.

_The Strahl's_ owners had a reserved parking space for their baby, thankfully not far from where I stood. I made my way over, to find the space occupied by the familiar ship.

"Penelo!" I heard Balthier yell. I looked up to find him and Fran standing on the very top deck of the airship.

I waved. "Hey!"

"Come on up!" he said from far above me. I climbed the ramp and made my way through the halls of level 1 until I came across the lift. I punched the button that would take me to the deck, and a few seconds later, I was there.

"It's good to see you," Balthier said, striding up to me, giving me a hug that I returned. "It really has been too long."

"Indeed it has," I said, smiling up at him. I was in much better spirits now than I had been five minutes ago. Reuniting with old friends will do that to you.

"This last year hasn't treated you well," Fran said, also giving me a hug. It had been nearly a year since we were all together last.

"But it has you," I said with a smile. She now wore her hair a little bit shorter and down so her long white wave cascaded down her back.

"So where's the strapping young skypirate?" Balthier asked.

"Who knows?" I asked, the frustration returning.

"Where in Ivalice could he be? Today he should be with his exquisite wife on your anniversary. He's a fool." He shook his head solemnly.

"You remembered," I said. Don't get me wrong, they are great friends, but are very busy. I could forgive them if they didn't remember my anniversary. "That's more than I can say for Vaan."

"Of course we remembered! It's hard to forget the wedding of two of the heroes that saved Dalmasca."

"I hope so."

* * *

A few hours later while Balthier was inside mixing drinks for us, Fran said, "Tell me what is really the matter Penelo. Forgetting one date doesn't usually warrant too much anger. Especially from you." 

She was right. I always used to feel so light and carefree, never angry with anyone or anything except injustice. Now I felt angry most of the time, mad at the world because my husband hardly remembers he made such a big commitment most of the time.

So I told her. I told her everything. I told her how Vaan would suddenly leave, sometimes for weeks at a time with nothing more than a note saying, "Went to Archades. See you when I get back."

It had occurred to me once that he might be having an affair, but I dismissed it. With so much business to attend to, he didn't have time for me, let alone another woman.

Balthier must have known not to interrupt as neither he nor the drinks made an appearance.

Fran sighed heavily. "That is the way it is with men, especially skypirates. I didn't want this to be true for you, but it seems that it is. Their first love is the sky, their ships. We come second."

"How do you and Balthier continue to stay so close?" I asked.

"I never married him."

Confused, I said, "I don't understand."

"Let me put it this way," she said, leaning forward. "You are Vaan's wife. You made a lifetime commitment to him when you said your vows. He knows you are there, that you are constant. People always tend to take the things in their lives that are permanent for granted. That is, until they are no longer there."

* * *

I was nineteen the night Vaan proposed to me. We were on the top deck of _the Dancer_, somewhere over the Estersand, just watching the sunset when he got down on one knee. He put the most beautiful diamond ring on my finger, telling me how much he'd always loved me. I said yes in an instant, all his faults completely blinded to me by love. We made love for the first time that night and I thought my life was perfect. And it was, for a while at least. 

We were engaged for two years, traveling the world and seeing the sights, making a boatload of money transporting goods for weapon makers.

Vaan and I married when I was twenty-one in a huge ceremony in the Dalmascan palace, courtesy of Queen Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca. It was a beautiful ceremony with all sorts of important people there, including a few royals. All of our friends came: Balthier and Fran, Emperor Larsa Ferrinas Solidor, Captain Basch, Reddas, the Marquis Halim Ondore IV, and even Al-Cid Margrace. It seemed people wanted to congratulate all those who helped put Dalmasca back on track.

Afterwards, we spent a leisurely honeymoon, for once just traveling for fun, not tied down by any responsibility. I didn't mind all the traveling, just as long as I was with Vaan.

The first six months of our marriage were amazing. It was as if it was only us, no one else in the world. We were selfish like all newlyweds, putting pleasure before responsibility. We lost a lot of business that way and it showed in our pocketbooks, especially when Vaan bought an old airship to fix up and sell. We didn't have enough money to fuel _the Dancer_ and to buy parts for the old airship. That dilapidated thing still sits in it's parking space to this day.

I didn't mind living with less, just as long as Vaan and I were together and happy. He, however, didn't see it that way. We'd both grown up dirt poor and on the streets but I had the 'you can't miss what you never had' attitude, while he wanted everything. Soon business began coming before all else. Sometimes he'd be gone for days trying to gain more customers that we didn't need.

After a while, we surpassed our previous income with much gil to spare. I told Vaan many times that I didn't need gil to make me happy. He never listened to a word I said, only replying that he did this all for me.

I really wished he'd do less.

* * *

Balthier rejoined us a little later, drinks in hand. We chatted for a while, catching up, before I grew very tired, drowsiness hitting me like a bullet. 

"Would you like to stay here tonight?" Fran asked. "You should not walk the streets alone this time of night."

"Yes, Penelo," Balthier said. "Our guest bedrooms have not seen use for quite some time."

I thought it over, making my decision quickly. By the off chance that Vaan was home, I didn't want to see him.

"Okay," I said, grateful.

* * *

**Please review with any questions/comments/concerns, as I'd appreciate it! Thanks!**

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

Thanks For the Memories

* * *

Chapter 2

* * *

I tossed and turned through the night, waking finally sometime around five. The sun was streaming in through my window and I knew I wouldn't be going back to sleep. Instead, I put on the long red peasant skirt and white tank top that Fran had loaned me, heading outside. I needed to clear my head, to think _everything_ over. I felt like I was emotionally going to short circuit and needed the refreshing pre-dawn that only Dalmasca can offer.

An hour and a half later, I watched the sun rise from the rail I leaned on, not really seeing it because I was far too absorbed in thought. I hadn't a clue as to what I was going to do. I just knew I needed to make a decision quickly.

Around seven, I went back inside to find breakfast ready, with Fran and Balthier about to sit down. I smiled as I joined them at the table.

"I'd say I hope you had a good night's rest, but the circles under you eyes say otherwise," Balthier said.

I smile sheepishly. "I didn't."

"I wouldn't worry about it then. Sleep is usually one of the treasures that's easy enough to come by."

The three of us ate omelets made from cockatrice eggs, wolf bacon, and fresh fruit. It was quite delicious. Afterwards, as we were leaving the dining room, Balthier, sensing my current mood, said, "We need to get you out of here. I dare say you should resent airships by now." So we headed for Rabanastre's shopping district.

We had a good time looking at weapons and armor, seeing what new sorts of bogus cures people would try to sell to unsuspecting victims. I decided to buy a new gun, one I'd never seen before, called a cartalee. The seller told me that it was a new weapon, newer to Dalmasca, just released in other countries from Rozzaria. It looked quite similar to the arcturus, but the bullet came out much faster and made the user's attack gauge fill up more quickly. We bought lunch from a vender and then went hunting for a few hours after stocking up on phoenix down.

Eventually, though, I knew I had to go home. Fran and Balthier walked me to the apartment. We exchanged hugs and promises to see each other soon.

Just as I was about to enter the lift, Balthier said, "If you need to get away for a while, out apartment in Archades had an extra room. We're leaving in three days, it's up to you."

I turned and smiled at them. "Thank you." I still wasn't yet sure what I was going to do but I was glad to know that I at least had options.

* * *

When the lift finally stopped on my floor, I got off and walked toward the door, cursing myself the entire way. I didn't want to go inside, not really, but in my heart, I wanted Vaan to be in there waiting for me, worried sick because I hadn't made it home last night. At the very least, I wanted him to be upset, to have _noticed_ that I was gone. It didn't seem likely.

Part of my wish did come true. He was there. I saw him at the kitchen table, balancing out damn revenue books again. Vaan looked up when he heard the front door shut and smiled. Noticing the bag in my hand that contained the cartalee, he said, "Oh, did you go shopping?"

I burst into tears against my will. I had promised myself that I wouldn't cry, but I just couldn't help it. He didn't notice that I hadn't come home last night and a majority of today, just that I _went out shopping._

He stood up quickly, crossing the room to take my hands. I wouldn't let him, dropping my bag on the plush carpet, and folding my arms across my chest. "What is it, Penelo?" His voice was sad, filled with concern.

I felt vindictive, even as the tears streamed down my face. I wanted to make him hurt as much as he's hurt me over the years. Physical abuse hurts immediately, but fades. Neglect can break you. I know it had me.

"_What's the matter?" _I asked, my voice hysterical. "What's the matter? Did you know I didn't come home last night? Do you even care?"

"I didn't know-"

"Of course you didn't! You weren't here!"

"I'm sorry, Penelo, but I had important business to attend to."

"Business," I spat disgustedly. "Do you even know what yesterday was?"

"Yesterday?" he asked. A moment later, the blood drained from his face, his usually tanned face now ashen. "Oh gods, Penelo, I'm so sorry." He tried to hug me, but I stepped backwards. Hurt registered on his face and I almost laughed because it took only a deflected hug to hurt him.

"You're always sorry," I said, trying my best to keep my voice even. It wasn't really working.

He simply stared at me for a moment before smiling slightly. "I know how I can make this up to you. Grab you jacket-"

"If you say we're getting on the airship, I'll probably shoot you." And I meant it. He shut up. "Don't you see all our problems stem from that blasted airship? You can't make it up to me, not this time."

"What can I do?" he asked in a quiet, defeated tone.

"Be there, Vaan. Actually be there for me."

confidence resonated throughout his voice. "I'll try, Penelo." He took my hands in his. For some reason, I let him. It was against my better judgement, but I let him.

"Don't try, Vaan, just do." He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close to him. I laid my head on his chest, sighing deeply.

"I will."

I looked up at him, into his eyes. "Promise."

He smiled. "I promise." I wanted to believe him, I really did.

Standing on my tiptoes as Vaan now stood six foot two, I kissed him gently, my fingers intertwining with his hair. The familiar excitement built in my stomach, sending tingling sensations everywhere, especially down south.

A few minutes later, Vaan pulled away, his eyes utterly dazed. "Do you want to?" he asked. I nodded fervently.

He picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist with his hands cupping my butt to support me. We continued kissing, my hands working their way down the row of buttons on his shirt. Once the last button was undone, I slid my hands inside his shirt, my fingers lightly trailing across his chest. In response, his hand kneaded my butt, issuing a sigh to slip from my lips. For all his faults, he was an excellent lover.

After trying to kick open the bedroom door while holding me didn't work, Vaan pressed me against the wall next to the door to help support my weigh and turned the knob and pushing the door open. He picked me up again and made his way through the door. He crossed the room and set me down on the bed, shrugging out of his shirt and joining me.

I gasped as I always did when I saw those washboard abs. Once we got out own airship and hand had to carry goods on and off all the time, it helped Vaan fill out quite nicely. In all the right places. His shoulders were broad, his arms strong and tan, covered in a light coat of hair only slight darker that what graced his head. My tank top quickly joined his shirt on the floor, along with his pants and my skirt.

Hovering over me, nearly naked, I rejoiced the way his flesh felt on mine, his legs rubbing against mine in an intoxicating sort of way. He unhooked my bra and slipped my panties off as I reached for his underwear.

In that moment, I got the strange feeling that this was the last time we'd make love. Wanting to trust that my husband wouldn't let me down again, I wrapped my legs around him and lost myself to the moment.

* * *

After we both climaxed (several times, I might add) we laid there, snuggled close to each other with my head on his chest and his arms around me. He was lazily stroking my blonde hair, fingers combing through it.

"Penelo," he said, breaking the sleeping lull I had fallen in.

"Yes?" I asked.

"We should just leave for a few days, just get away for a while."

My heart swelled. I sat up on my side and looked him in the eye. "Really?" I asked skeptically.

"Yeah," he said. "Let's just get away from everything for a while, not tell anyone where we're going."

I grinned. "And where will we be going?"

"I don't know. That's the beauty of it.

* * *

I was still awake hours after Vaan had fallen asleep, criticizing myself for falling for his charm yet again. I desperately wanted to believe what he said, so much so that I physically ached. It couldn't be helped after so many repeated offences and broken promises.

I wanted the life every woman wants; a handsome and loving husband, a couple of kids, a beautiful home. I knew Vaan loved me, but did he love me more than he loved pirating and making money? Or less?

I decided that I wouldn't be second any longer, especially since he'd been my number one for all my life.

If he couldn't put me first, couldn't keep his promise this time, I would leave.

Blindly, I reached for Vaan the next morning. My hand came in contact with only sheet and blanket. Prying my eyes open, vision indeed confirmed that he wasn't in bed.

I crawled out of bed, grabbing my robe from the back of the closet door and put it on. "Vaan?" I called as I approached the bathroom. After getting no response, I peaked inside. He wasn't there now, but he obviously had been fairly recently.

I searched the rest of the apartment for him, finding no one. Glazed doughnuts were set out one the counter, along with fresh iced tea. I poured a cup, grabbed a doughnut and sat down at the kitchen table.

Noticing a white sheet of paper with my name on it resting on the table, I picked it up and unfolded it. After all the promises, he still had the audacity to leave on business. I knew exactly what it said because it was the same note I'd received a hundred times previous.

It read:

_Dear Penelo,_

_I'm so sorry, but a really great business opportunity has come up. I'll be back in a few days, so be ready to leave this all behind for a while. I love you._

_Love Vaan_

Furious, I crumpled up the piece of paper and stalked to the bedroom. I pulled two suitcases from the closet and began stuffing clothes, toiletries, and my weapons inside; whatever I could get my hands on. Throwing on the first clean outfit I came across, I carried the suitcases to the kitchen, picked up my new cartalee and slid it into it's holster. I uncrumbled the piece of paper and picked up the pen Vaan had used.

_Vaan,_

_Thanks for the memories._

_Penelo_

My hand trembled as I wrote, with rage, fury and a hint of despair. It was legible, which was far more than Vaan deserved.

Grabbing my suitcases, I slammed the front door for the last time. And I was gone.

* * *

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter. shall update very soon. please leave a review!!**

**webofdreams89**

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

Thanks For the Memories

* * *

Chapter 3

* * *

I hailed a carriage and arrived at the airfield a half-hour later. After paying the driver, I dragged my suitcases to _the Strahl's_ parking space, sighing with relief to see that it was still there. I knew they said they'd be in town for three days, but I'd learned not to put much stock in what skypirates say.

A small moogle ambled down the ramp as I approached the airship. "Hello Miss Penelo!" the moogle squeaked as she approached me. Her name was Gurdy and she was dressed in a long, pink dress with a flower pinned in her light brown fur, just under her left ear. Balthier had hired her and her brothers just after _the Strahl_ had mysteriously disappeared from Vaan and my care several years previous.

"Hi Gurdy," I said fondly. I'd always had a soft spot for moogles. Absolutely adorable and good with a wrench, they'd offered me a lot more companionship than _someone_ has of late.

"Miss Penelo! Mr. Balthier and Miss Fran aren't here right now, but they told me to see you inside if you showed up!"

"Well, thank-you, Gurdy," I said. I followed her up _the Strahl's_ ramp, smiling down at her.

I put my bags in the guest bedroom I used only two nights ago and followed Gurdy to the engine room. Other that the top deck, the engine room was my favorite place to be when on an airship. I was surprisingly adept with a wrench myself and had fixed _the Dancer_ on many occasions. With me around, Vaan never really had the need to hire moogles. A real money saver, I suppose.

"A turb ring will last longer if you grease it up a bit first," I said absentmindedly to a moogle named Limo.

"Your husband was right, you do know a thing or two about airships," Balthier said from behind me.

I turned to find him and Fran standing there, both wearing identical amused expressions. "I probably know more," I said truthfully.

"I wouldn't doubt it." They backed out of the room and I followed. "So you decided to take a vacation from the married life after all."

"A permanent leave of absence is what I'd call it."

"Don't say that, Penelo," Balthier said very seriously.

"Why not? He'll never change."

"You don't know that. Maybe your leaving for now is exactly what he needs to get his priorities straightened out."

"Maybe," I agreed doubtfully.

"Hmm. We'll be leaving momentarily so get ready for liftoff."

"We're leaving now? I didn't think you guys were leaving for another two days."

"That's how long we were going to wait for you to join us. Our business in Rabanastre is done and you're here now, so there is no reason to stay. Or is there, Penelo?"

I stopped short, breathing deeply. I was actually going to do this, I was actually going to leave my husband. My heart sped up and I felt flushed.

"Something wrong?" Balthier said with a wry, knowing smile.

I let out my breath, just realizing that I had been holding it. "No," I said determinedly. "I need this. Let's go."

* * *

About twenty-four hours later, we landed _the Strahl_ in an airfield smack-dab in the middle of the Imperial City of Archades. Coming to the Empire was a lot less scary this time around than it had been before. Landing cleanly in an airfield is a completely different experience than sneaking in with the help of a few shady characters.

After getting off with the ship with suitcases in hand, Balthier summoned a carriage, one far grander than those in Rabanastre. The carriage itself was very roomy, composed of solid iron with plush black velvet seats. The chocobos that pulled it were all equally mammoth with either solid white or black coats of feather, no color deficiencies to speak of. They looked noble, graceful, but all wore the same bored expressions.

Then again, everything in Archades was grander. It was the appearance the past several emperors had been working so hard to maintain. But I had been in the slums, in Old Archades and had seen first hand how harsh that poverty and desolation was in this city. That was one of the things that Larsa, or should I say Emperor Larsa Ferrinas Solidor, was working hard to fix. From his and Basch's letters, I head they were really doing a lot of good for the people of Archadia. I was really proud of him and all he's accomplished since his coronation. I knew personally how real death was, but somehow he managed to put aside his father and brother's deaths and make his country truly great.

Our carriage stopped abruptly in front of a very large building with a least a hundred floors. We got out, grabbed our luggage and approached the front doors.

"Ffamren! It's good you're home!" a man dressed in a stuffy looking gray suit said as we opened the door. "I can get someone to get your bags for you."

"It's Balthier, as I've told you on numerous occasions, I'm sure. And no thanks, we can get them ourselves." Balthier's voice was full of annoyance. I knew he couldn't stand how people treated him because of his family's reputation.

"So you have," the man said, not apologetic in the least. "I will remember next time." He had think black hair down his back and brown eyes. I nearly laughed at him, but held it in. It was as if he was imitating Vayne in every way: style, mannerism, persona. Kind of creepy, actually.

"That is Mr. Vayner," Fran whispered in my ear. Vayner? Oh jeez. "He's the owner of he building and quite likes to schmooze with the bigger names. He didn't own the building when we moved in."

Balthier just kept right on walking to the lift, ignoring Mr. Vayner completely. You couldn't blame him. After knowing the guy about thirty seconds, I truly hoped I'd never see him again.

"Who is your friend?" Vayner called as we got on the lift. "Is she that one skypirate's wife?"

I cringed as the lift doors shut.

I hadn't been gong long enough to determine whether or not I regretted my decision, but when I thought about how Vaan had broken my heart so many times, the vengeful part of me was glad I left. Glad I could leave him and the heartache, broken promises and neglect.

I didn't know if I would end up regretting my decision, but I was determined to remain steadfast in my choice. If he _really _wanted me, then he'd come find me. But even if he did, I didn't know if I'd actually let myself see him.

Fran and Balthier's apartment was large and meticulously decorated. It had a living room, kitchen, study, and two bedrooms each with their own bathrooms. I put my clothes away and changed my outfit, putting on a modest black dress and matching jacket. After fixing my hair and make-up, I wandered out to the living room to wait for Fran and Balthier. They promised to take me to visit Larsa and Basch today, adding that we were expected when I asked.

From their bedroom, I could hear them talking and laughing joyfully. They were so in love and in tune with each other that it made me hurt all the more.

My heart fell and a single tear ran down my cheek.

* * *

Growing up, it had always been Reks that I had a crush on. He was handsome, kind, and three years older than I was. A lethal combination when you're a young girl, one that always results in a full-fledged crush. This was my case. I would tag along with him and Vaan, and not only because Vaan was my best friend. I think he knew, but he never said anything about, just smiled.

And then their parents died, casualties of the war. My parents readily took them it; Reks' and Vaan's parents had been their best friends.

I was fourteen when he enlisted and was killed in battle. I was heartbroken, but as I mourned, I realized that I considered my loss as more as that of losing a brother rather than a lover. And while I watched Vaan cry, I knew whom it was that I really loved. Don't get me wrong, it still hurt most desperately when we lost Reks, but it wasn't quite the same.

My parents died not long after, victims of the plague that had swept Dalmasca. Our country was poor, only the rich could afford the vaccine. It was mandatory that all the young received the vaccine, that's why I'm still here. But my parents couldn't afford it, so I had to watch them slowly waste away when they had once been so radiant and _alive._

Vaan and I stared dating just before he snuck into the castle that night, changing our lives forever. We were still as that slightly awkward stage in our relationship, despite having been friends nearly since birth. Dating changed things; we looked at each other differently.

Leaving the one person that had been in my life forever was like leaving your legs behind. It hurt, both physically and mentally.

* * *

I felt incredibly guilty for having left yesterday morning, especially after I had just promised Penelo we'd go on a vacation. I knew she'd be mad at me again, but I hoped she's at least be forgiving.

I knew that as a husband, I really let her down. I wasn't home enough, I wasn't there for her when she needed me. I feel terrible about breaking so many promises to her, but I did it anyway, hating myself every time I see her eyes so filled with hurt. I just want to provide for her, to give her the kind of life she's always deserved.

That is why I left yesterday, to bring in money to buy her beautiful clothes and jewelry, to leave her money to decorate our apartment as she wants, and most importantly, to invest in our futures.

After landing _the Dancer_, I shut everything down quickly and ran the entire way home. I had made over four million gil yesterday transporting a load of weapons that on one else would.

When I opened the front door, I noticed immediately how quiet it was. No, not quiet even. Silent. The only thing I could hear was my heavy breathing from my run.

Something definitely didn't feel right. I felt so..._wrong._

On the kitchen table, I saw the note I wrote Penelo, only now it looked like it had been crumbled up and there was more writing on it. I crossed the room and picked it up, reading it quickly.

"_Thanks for the memories?"_ What did _that_ mean?

And then it hit me as to why it was so silent, why it didn't feel right. She left, Penelo left me.

I didn't want to believe it, thinking that there was no way she would leave me. Rushing to the bedroom, I discovered clothes all over the place. Her hairbrush and other toiletries were gone from the bathroom. Lastly, I looked in the closet and found two suitcases missing.

That's when I knew, knew in my heart that she was gone and wasn't coming back.

I dropped to my knees, huge rattling sobs shaking my body as I hugged the crumpled note to my chest.

* * *

**A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I'll be updating soon with the conclusion of this little story. There will be a small epilogue too. Please review!!**

**webofdreams89**

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

* * *

Thanks for the Memories

* * *

Chapter 4

* * *

I don't know how long I sat there on the floor crying and I didn't care. Penelo was gone and getting her back was the only thing that mattered to me. Screw being manly. 

Right then, though, I was far too exhausted to go look for her. Instead, I went to the bed and collapsed. My hands pulled Penelo's pillow to me. I held it as I would have held her. I nearly started crying again when I realized that her scent was ingrained into the pillow. Eventually, I fell into a fitful sleep, having strange dreams about me finally discovering Penelo, only to find out that she had twelve children, none of them mine.

I awoke more than twenty-four hours later, all strange dreams forgotten. I wished that I could have forgotten _everything_, but the weight of everything that had transpired hit me like an anvil falling from the sky the second I opened my eyes.

The only thing I could think to do was to go to the palace and ask Ashe if she knew where Penelo was. Hell, she might have even been there, I thought. I just had to get her back, convince her that I love her, need her to survive.

Twenty minutes later, I was in one of the castle's many studies, waiting for Ashe to come see me. The second she entered the room, I stood, bombarding her with questions. "Have you seen Penelo? Is she here? Do you know where she is?"

Over the past few years, Ashe and Penelo had become very good friends, Penelo going to the castle to visit quite often. As far as I knew, Penelo considered Ashe to be her best girl friend.

"Is she missing?" Ashe asked, her voice full of concern.

Not able to speak, I gave her the note Penelo had left. She read it over quickly. "Oh, Vaan, I'm so sorry."

I cleared my throat, asking, "You haven't seen her, have you?"

"I haven't see _her_, but-"

"But what?" I asked eagerly.

"Well, Balthier and Fran came to visit me a few days ago. They might still be in town."

My heart sank. "So Penelo's in Archades?"

"I didn't say that. She might not be," Ashe added quickly.

"But you think she is," I stated.

She breathed deeply and replied, "Yes, I do think she went with them to Archades."

My heart sank, if possible, even lower. If Penelo wanted to run, Archades was about as far as you could go and still be in Ivalice.

To be on the safe side, I paid a visit to the airfield, discovering that _the Strahl_ had left the day before. I talked to everyone I could think of, but no one had seen Penelo. I even checked every hotel in Rabanastre but she wasn't checked in to any of them, at least under her own name.

Resigned that Penelo never wanted to see me again, I got on _the Dancer_ and took off, not sure where exactly I was going.

* * *

It was so good to see Basch and Larsa again, as I hadn't seen them since my wedding. Two years was a lot of time to catch up on. But then again, that was how I spent much of my time in Archades, visiting my friends. I think they sensed how lonely I was because they never said a word about my frequent visits. 

Sometimes Balthier and Fran went away on business. They always asked me to accompany them, but I always declined. I was in the way enough and didn't want to by anymore so than I already was.

When I wasn't visiting friends, I was wandering the streets of Archades, shopping and sightseeing. That only lasted for a few days before it got boring. At the end of the first week, I joined a hunt club, slaying bothersome monsters for pay. I didn't need the money so I always donated it to the orphanages. In knew personally how it felt to be suddenly without parents.

I won't deny that I missed Vaan. I missed him a great deal, more than I cared to even admit to myself, especially at night. Or when I was out on a hunt. We always liked to go hunting together.

I first noticed that something was wrong with me when I was out on a hunt out to destroy a particularly nasty dire rat that had grown to about five times it's natural size. With shortness of breath and nausea, I just ended up puking on the rat, stopping it in its tracks, stunned, giving me the chance to kill it.

Every morning for a week straight I awoke just to rush to the toilet and throw up. I had backaches and my feet constantly hurt. All the telltale signs of pregnancy. I purchased a home testing kit, which confirmed my suspicions.

I was at least two months pregnant and had no clue as to what I was going to do.

* * *

"She should go back to him," Fran said to me one morning while Penelo slept. 

"But she won't. No, he should be the one to go to her."

"Has word of Vaan's whereabouts yet reached your ears?" she asked me.

I nodded solemnly. "Apparently _the Dancer_ has been parking in the Estersand for quite some time now."

"Just parked?"

"Yes. It seems Vaan has turned in to quite the drunk. He never leaves the airship except to buy more beer."

"Maybe if we told him he had a little one on the way..."

"I think you're right, Fran. It might just be what he needs to get his act together. Besides, he's the father and has a right to know."

Later that day, we informed Penelo that we had business to attend to and left later that day. Finding Vaan wasn't all that difficult; all you had to do was follow the stench. We landed _the Strahl_ and I got off, crossing the sand to find Vaan slumped against the ramp of his airship. It hurt me physically to see a ship so carelessly taken care of.

He stirred as I approached, opening one eye. "Ball-there?" he asked in a slurred voice.

"Something like that," I replied, trying hard to hid my look of disgust. He sat up, leaning against the doorway. "Vaan, you look terrible. Smell worse."

"Ha. Ha. You're so funny."

"I like to think so." I crossed my arms across my chest, staring at the once exuberant youth with a frown.

"So where's my wife? Did she finally realize that she needs me?"

"No," I replied honestly.

"Good," he said. "I don't _want_ her back."

"You always were a terribly liar. You need her and she needs you," I pointed out.

"She doesn't need me. That's why she left. Because _she doesn't need me!_" He slumped again in defeat.

"That is where you're wrong, Vaan. She needs you, especially now."

He looked up sharply. "What's that supposed to mean?"

I took a deep breath. "She carries your child, Vaan."

He appeared shocked to learn this. "She's pregnant?" I nodded.

"Which is why I suggest you clean up you act and get you ass to Archades and apologize."

"But she doesn't want me," he said hopelessly.

"So make her want you! Prove to her that you love her more than anything else in Ivalice!" Just to be sure, I asked, "You do love her most, don't you?"

"Of course I do!" he said, standing up. I was surprised because he didn't even stumble, as any other drunk would have. I raised an eyebrow. "They're all filled with water," he explained, tapping and empty bottle with his boot. "I wanted her to feel bad when she found out that I became a drunk because she left."

I rolled my eyes at his logic.

"How do I prove to her I love her most?" he asked in perfect clarity.

"I'd say drastic action is the best course of action..."

* * *

I groaned as I heard someone knock on the door. "I'm coming!" I yelled. Balthier and Fran were still away on business so it was up to me to answer the door. 

After slipping a sundress on, I trudged to the door. I undid the several locks and opened the door, my jaw dropping.

"Penelo," Vaan said. I slammed the door in his face, locking it.

"Come on, Penelo, please open the door," I heard him say. I ignored him, trying to catch my breath. "Please Penelo!"

"Go away, Vaan!" I said, my resolve wavering. I could deny him if her was hundreds of miles away, but right in front of me, only a piece of wood separating us...

"Penelo," he said, his voice deep. "I know you're pregnant."

"They went to see _you?"_ I asked, feeling totally betrayed. "I don't believe this!" Tears spilled wildly down my cheeks.

"They have been concerned about us."

I didn't reply.

"I love you Penelo. I've missed you so much and I've come to tell you I'm prepared to take responsibility for my actions. I know I've hurt you and I really hate myself for it."

I slid down the wall, clutching to my sides.

"I want to prove to you I've changed. Please Penelo," my husband pleaded.

I wanted to believe his so much...

Which is why I stood and unlocked the door.

He bent to embrace me, but I stopped him. "Don't touch me, Vaan, or I'll throw you back out."

"Okay," he said agreeably. "But you have to come with me to see."

"See what?" I asked.

"That I've changed."

"That's something you can show me? Right now?"

"Yes it is. But you have to come with me."

I agreed to go with him. Once we reached the bottom floor of the apartment building on the lift, he led me outside and into a waiting carriage. I got in, waiting for him to elaborate, but he didn't. We rode in the carriage for a half-hour, exiting the city of Archades completely.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"You'll see," he said cryptically, wearing a half smile.

A while later, I saw an enormous _something_ in the distance. As we got closer, I saw that it was _the Dancer._ I almost got out of the carriage then, but decided to against it.

The carriage stopped a good distance from _the Dancer_, more than walking distance. I gave Vaan a puzzled look. He just whispered, "You'll see," and grabbed my hand, leading me out of the carriage. I knew I shouldn't have let him touch me, but I did anyway. And it felt so good to touch him again that I couldn't pull away after he took my hand.

Two folding chairs were set out in the middle of the sand. I hadn't noticed them from the carriage. He motioned for me to sit down, sitting down himself only after I reluctantly did.

Vaan turned to me and sought my hand again, giving me an almost sad smile, and whispered, "You once said that all our problems stem from the airship. It took a visit from our friends to make me realize that it was true."

"I don't understand-"

"I know, but you will." He pulled what looked like a walkie-talkie from his pocket, holding a button in and saying, "Light her up."

A second later, thousands of tiny lights on _the Dancer_ lit up, casting a bright white glow. It took me a moment to realize that it was spelling something out: thanks for the memories.

I turned to him quickly. Those were my words to him, my dismissal.

"This is for you, Penelo," he said in a quiet voice. "Fire!" he yelled into the walkie-talkie, squeezing my hand tightly.

_The Strahl_ came roaring overhead, missiles flying from the ships guns, hitting _the Dancer _until it resembled a cheese grater and blew up.

"Vaan?" I asked breathlessly, not believing my eyes.

"For you, Penelo," my husband said, looking at me resolutely. "I did it for you."

* * *

**A/N: Sadly, this is the last chapter, but there is still an epilogue so be sure to read it. I really enjoyed writing this story. Let me know if i should write a sequel because i just might if i think someone will read it. Please review!! Thanks!! **

webofdreams89

* * *


	5. Epilogue

* * *

Thanks for the Memories

* * *

Epilogue

* * *

Later that night as I snuggled close to my husband, I was still in shock. "I can't believe you had _the Dancer_ destroyed."

Vaan chuckled, my head rising and falling in unison to his laughs. "Why is it so hard to believe?" He sat up, causing me to sit up as well. Vaan took my hands in his big, callused ones, tracing small circles in my palms with the pads of his thumbs.

"I don't know. You loved that ship."

"But I love you more," he pointed out. "And it was the only way I could prove it to you."

"Couldn't you have just... sold it?"

"Nope. I would have been far too tempted to pay way too much money to buy it back. I am a skypirate after all. We all spend way too much gil on our airships."

"And now you're a skypirate without an airship..." I said softly, fully realizing everything he sacrificed for me.

"We still have an airship," he said, leaning in to kiss my forehead.

"What? Oh, you mean that hunk of junk back in Rabanastre?" I could hardly believe what he was saying. That piece of scrap metal couldn't fly two feet.

"Yep. I figure it'll give us something to do together until we become parents." Vaan let go of one of my hands and spread his fingers across my stomach. I smiled.

"Can you believe we're about to become parents?" I asked, adding, "I'm terrified."

"Really? You've been a mother to me my entire life."

I pushed his chest down so he once again lay flat on the bed, and straddled him. I kissed him deeply, then pulled away. "Not in every respect, I hope."

"No," he agreed eagerly. "Not in every respect."

* * *

**A/N: and now the story is completed. i hope you thoroughly enjoyed it. let me know what you think about the story in general and whether or not i should write a sequel.**

* * *


End file.
